Definitions:
While you can lose a trigger to either letting it die out (extinguishing) on it's own or the conditioned stimulus being present inappropriately, you can bring it back by either conditioning it again the same way, or you can even just try to kick the memory back on by asking if they remember how it felt before trying the stimulus.
Forward conditioning puts the conditioned stimulus (the bell) first, then the unconditioned stimulus (the food). "Delay" conditioning keeps the conditioned stimulus running simultaneously with the unconditioned stimulus, and "trace" conditioning leaves space between the stimuli. Simultaneous conditioning is where both stimuli are presented at the same time. While you'd think this would work, this is not an effective method. Second-order conditioning chains two unconditioned stimuli. First, conditioning the bell, then conditioning the metronome, both by forward conditioning. Temporal conditioning is - you guessed it, conditioning at a time of day or a day of week, etc. Backwards conditioning has the unconditioned stimulus follow the conditioned stimulus - ringing the bell after the food.
Stimulus generalization - if your partner is conditioned to bark at the sound of a certain dog clicker, they may feel the urge to bark at the sound of a finger snap. Stimulus discrimination is something you can train if you continue to repeat the correct stimuli, and continue to avoid rewards on the conditioned stimulus. Latent inhibition is where a familiar existing stimulus takes longer to associate, since the old association gets in the way (or makes it feel as if it doesn't fit.)
Prediction theory is just the idea of expectation - we don't need to know the details of this, all we need to know is that forward conditioning is the ideal method of conditioning, because of the concept of prediction. In addition, your conditioned stimulus should 'belong,' otherwise you're going against the grain. Your partner may just not get the idea of looking at a keyboard and salivating immediately, or find it silly.
A form of learning in which behaviors are dependent on, or controlled by its rewards and consequences. The carrot and stick for training behavior.
Throughout considering the concept of conditioning, it's important to remember that we're ALWAYS conditioning each other.
In the terms we use in operant conditioning:
| Conditioning | Non-Hypnotic | Hypnotic |
|---|---|---|
+R |
A genuine thank you and a warm smile after they bring you a slice of cake. | Telling your partner their mouth feels oh-so-good on you. They feel a rush of pleasure, as suggested for when you praise them. |
-R |
You've previously complained about your partner having a messy room. They cleaned up so you'd stop complaining. | They've felt discomfort fitting something large in their mouth - but you've hypnotically removed the discomfort. |
+P |
Your partner ignores an order and you give them a stern talking to. | Your partner ignores an order and you hypnotically give them the same experience. |
-P |
Your partner is slacking from doing laundry because they're gaming. You take away their game system. | You want to tease your partner and stop them from masturbating. You take away the pleasure from touching themselves. |
Since this is about operant conditioning, not classical conditioning, extinction is a bit different. Extinction can still happen naturally over time, but now we have the phenomena of extinction bursts, where, if the positive reinforcement isn't given, they'll try repeating things again and again until they get the positive reinforcement.
-Giving a lukewarm response 'going through the motions' can be a negative reinforcement.
Funishment is absolutely a thing - for a masochist that wants to be shocked or spanked, or someone who wishes to be humiliated being treated like a dog. Or even, they can find intrinsic value of the D/s relationship, so taking away their ability to masturbate may become a treat because they'd like the control.
For some, the ultimate punishment is explaining genuine disappointment, especially in D/s relationships.
Be aware that while you need to make sure that you use a reinforcement appropriately, that you do not use one at an inappropriate or unrelated time.
Reward size can vary - not only when you give it, but also contextually depending on where your partner is at mentally or emotionally at the moment. For example, if your partner is an a poor mood, you'll likely need to give them a bit more than just a quiet small chocolate to knock them out of that state. (Or, in some cases, a small amount of praise can really turn their day around.) Being judicious with the reward size can help prevent escalation.
On the other side, a Jackpot and be used occasionally to make major changes. Or, you can use one to prep your partner for behavior modification.
While there are some suggestions here about reinforcement schedules, being in tune to your partner really is the most important part. Take these as inspiration, not rules.
| Schedule | Example | Base Efficacy |
|---|---|---|
| Continuous | Headpats, every time they call you master. | Learning is quick, but the efficacy falls off quickly as well. |
| Fixed Ratio (partial) | Headpats, once every three times they call you master. | High levels of response and motivation. However, since your partner will catch on, this can feel trite unless you explain your intentions. |
| Variable Ratio (Partial) | Headpats, after a random number of responses. | Reliable responses, good after the initial training. |
| Fixed Interval Schedule (Partial) | Headpats, once per day, when your partner calls you master. | Good responses since the partner is 'expecting' the reward, and the responsiveness dips just a bit after the reward is given. |
| Variable Interval Schedule (Partial) | After a random amount of time, when your partner calls you master, you pat them on the head. The number of headpats do not correlate with with the number of times they called you master. | Resistant to extinction and a steady response rate. |
The TLDR of this is - use these all as tools and inspiration, not as a guide. Get in tune with your partner and see what works. None of this is to suggest that we give our partners the cold shoulder to make our training more effective - in the end this is about your relationship. (So, be aware that a mild or lukewarm thank you may actually R-.)
This can be broken down into a simple, easy to follow strategy:
Assuming your partner is into this, finding out their eager to proceed will help the process. If they're in to denial, deny them the ability to try to progress for a bit. If they want to move faster, encourage it, but be sure to pace alongside them, and reward their progress.
Move slowly - there's no reason to hastily squander an enjoyable process. In addition, if there's no end goal, this could be an enjoyable, never-ending project instead of a mountain to climb.
(There isn't a hell of a lot here.)
Some tips:
Consider that - the path to brainwashing is nonlinear, and will provide you with many choices. It's all right (and encouraged) to experiment. For example, if your partner is begging for sub time, you could give it to them, but you're reinforcing the behavior to beg. You might try denying them and asking them to prove to you how much they'd like sub time, or ask them for some other behavior you've discussed.
Don't forget to reinforce the choices they make for you that you like positively - if you like them dressing up or even showing up on time for you, make sure you reward that and show your appreciation.
There's not much reason to use punishment in positive reinforcement - from earlier chapters, we already know that using this is likely to reduce the urge to engage as an undesirable side effect to discouraging the unwanted behavior. In addition, in your hypnotic sessions, you'll obviously want them to interact with you and feel comfortable opening up to you, so avoiding punishments (not to be confused with funishments) is ideal.
Know that if we're trying to adjust some sort of pattern or belief that is unconscious, as usual, avoid punishments. Beliefs and feelings often feel out of our control. Positively reinforcing behaviors and thoughts that you want to encourage will be much easier than trying to wrangle their unconscious into submission.
The biggest tip I like from this chapter is to change the rules to fit the behavior, rather than change the behavior to fit the rules. This is 'free' to do emotionally, and will give you a wedge in for change, rather than going directly against the grain. (Ex: If you'd like your partner to make more advances on you, shift the rules and requests to include something they're already doing, like texting you with requests to play.)
As the brainwasher, you're also subject to all the effects and needs as an animal as well. You gain satisfaction from watching behaviors change, as well as possibly becoming dependent on your partner wanting to be there for you. Be aware that their actions, responsiveness, and even existence are changing you as well. Exercise vigilance and awareness of something souring your mood or changing your needs, and taking those needs out on your partner.
Really, this is just creating association in a broader sense. Instead of (pace, pace, pace), leading to their body becoming heavier, you (pace) lead into a 'complex change.' Such as, because they've been so receptive to your conditioning, they're ideal for brainwashing.
This is just an extension of radical utilization. In the broadest sense, make everything a 'win' for your control. EG - if they're masturbating without thinking of you, the next time it will be even stronger.
You don't really need to make big changes to give the feeling of 'control.' Simply suggest they're doing something because of your will. Even changing some basic preferences can feel huge to your partner. Giving your partner a mantra in the morning can really boost that feeling of corruption if they want it. Continuing that, reminding your partner about how they used to behave or see themselves can be huge.
| Type | Example/Trigger |
|---|---|
| Conditioned reinforcers | Good girl/boy/pet/toy That makes me so happy Head Pats Bell Sounds Applause |
| Anchoring/Triggers | Snap your fingers Touch their shoulder You say a specific word or phrase They put their head on their pillow They start to masturbate |
| (Trigger Results) | Feel some kind of pleasure Get dumber Make a noise or say a phrase Forget the last five seconds Freeze Change personalities or become doll-like |
| Sexual Pleasure | Increasing the physical sensations of having your partner touch themselves Having an intense jolt of pleasure to which they can't react Having a vivid recollection of the best sex they've ever had Hitting the edge of an orgasm Feeling the heat of arousal spread slowly through them Becoming engulfed or consumed with a sense of ecstasy |
| Emotional Pleasure | The feeling of: Winning a game Achieving a goal that's been set for a long time Pleasing their partner Being Carefree Fulfilled or satisfied Being a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10 Being a well loved pet Being under your thumb |
| Praise | Oh yeah, that's hot You're doing so well Look how pretty your eyes are when they flutter So responsive What a good dolly Wow, you're such a dumb bibmo |
| Mantras | I can't think I am a dumb slut Obedience is pleasure (Who is a good toy?) (I am master.) This slave is brainwashed (Going deep...) (...Is so easy) |
| Protocol | Maintaining proper posture Asking permission for something they might normally have easy access to Wearing a certain item of clothing or accessory in certain situations Eye contact (making or not making) Taking a photo of themselves every day Opening doors or carrying items for you |
| Gifts | Anchor where they feel a rush of submissiveness, touching a body part Hypnotically replacing a part of their body with something magical (or adding phantom tail or wings) The feeling of an invisible collar or jewelry on them A mental state when they wear an article of clothing The very act of giving a suggestion |
| Denial | Allowing them or instructing them to masturbate, but not to orgasm Total sexual pleasure denial Not allowed to moan or make sounds Only allowing orgasm under certain conditions like when they are giving oral Not allowed to eat one of their favorite foods Not allowing them to go into trance to a beloved crystal |
| Causality Cause and Effect Complex Equivalence |
You are brainwashing them because they deserve it for being good Experiencing things this intensely means they are giving up so much control to you Being this conditioned probably means Their orgasms will get stronger, thinking of you They are going to excel at pleasuring you Because they have been thinking of you so much Absentmindedly forgetting something might mean They are actually getting a little dumber Your ability to learn through conditioning Makes you well suited to being brainwashed |
| Traps | They are being brainwashed Even when they're unconsciously processing it and not actively thinking about it Even when they're not masturbating about you It just makes the next time they do it stronger Their daily routine brainwashes them Because they are training themselves to behave well Familiar and familiar trance responses Make them learn more about themselves as a subject and thus more suggestible Unlearning a behavior is just an opportunity to relearn And get more brainwashed When they think about being obedient to you They have some sort of response, even if they don't notice it |
| Control | Changing the way they respond hypnotically Like strengthening eye flutters Telling them to dress a certain way Making them improve at cooking Only allowing them to touch a part of their body When they've asked permission Implanting thought patterns (that they periodically get stuck in) |
Something I haven't thought about before - good scenes should have multiple ramps of intensity.
I do like the idea of, in your pre talk, if your subject gives you a 'blue' and you're comfortable with the risk, agreeing to be able to negotiate up during a scene. You can even consider negotiating 'sideways' if a scene starts to take a different direction.
Be careful with intentional or unintentional metaphors in your scene, they can encourage deeper, undesirable changes. Framing something as teacher/student, moon/underwater, psychologist/subject can really let things go deeper than intended.
I've run into this before - I've definitely had a few pet/master situations bleed outside of the scene and into my personal relationships. Not ideal.
I yoinked these handy-dandy lists for ideas during negotiation.
Situations:
Tones:
Questions for both the ‘tist and subject:
RACK means not only awareness, but acceptance. I also like throwing PRICK in here as well as both parties should take personal responsibility in this. If you are ‘tisting, require your subject to take active part in risk awareness and management. If your subject already has problems with their independence, this makes high-risk play even less advisable.
If you are hypnotically reducing resistance, paradoxically, you will also need to make sure you encourage their own agency, perhaps framing their lack of resistance as their inability to prevent their own agency. You need to encourage them and make sure they learn to say 'no' during trance, and can bring themselves out. You, as the 'tist, need to be able to trust they can reject unwanted phenomena. Safety suggestions are good, but fallible, and you should be promoting healthy behavior patterns in addition to permission to resist and reject unwanted suggestions.
Gaslighting, at it's core, is manipulating your subject into putting their own beliefs into question. Obviously, as a negative and long-term side-effect of this is your partner may begin to question their beliefs and memories.
You can mitigate some risks by gaslighting in a playful or flirtatious manner, perhaps with a tell, over things that are of little consequence like 'what to have for dinner.' You can also do it over pre-arranged topics with limited scope.
Interestingly - there's a gaslighter group on VRC, and they've got plenty of nasty examples.
You already know how to create these associations, you can use the same tools you already know to break them.
Ask yourself why a behavior is persisting, since the best choice is the one that will persist